blooming

They tell me what I don't want to hear,

that I should be more like someone else

that I'm not who they thought I was.

But I'm many things,

some parts of me are just hidden

some parts of me are almost gone

some parts of me I never knew I had.

Some parts of me only show when I'm scared

vulnerable

weak

sad.

When I'm crying in the emptiness of my room,

and no one can see me

and no one can judge me

because no one will ever know.

I show one face to the world,

the one face

which defines me

even though that face is slowly fading away.

The fear inside me,

to change

to not know what will happen next

to take the risk.

Scared to let go of her

to forget her world

to feel comfortable in my own skin

when I know she's not part of me anymore.